Drew Curtis' FARK.com

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Not News Sports Business Geek Showbiz Politics Music Video All

Thu March 11, 2010

Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		Teen shoots himself in the testicles. Bet he doesn't have the balls to do that again (contracostatimes.com)	(37)
		Homeless man finds shelter by using hotel reward points earned when he had a high-paying job (consumerist.com)	(31)
		Officials say bobcat responsible for power outage, ruining police academy movies (hosted.ap.org)	(17)
		Small B.C. surf town of Tofino takes stand, moves to ban McDonald's, Starbucks, and Tim Hortons from wrecking its radical character (vancouversun.com)	(64)
		Hard-assed hood has brain hemorrhage and goes into coma for two weeks. Wakes up with a passion to paint, speak in rhyme, write poetry and love of kittens (dailymail.co.uk)	(38)
		Theme of Farktography Contest No. 253: "I'm a Geek, and I'm Proud of It". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme (farktography.net)	(158)

Wed March 10, 2010

	Man strangles his girlfriend to death and then tries to kill himself by drinking bleach and slashing his wrists. Of course, he went across the street and not down the block (press-citizen.com)	(64)
	Not news: Woman decides to rob people. News: Successfully robs 11 people. Fark: Robs $6 (nbclosangeles.com)	(47)
(Mlive.com)	He won $150 at the MGM Grand in Detroit, met two women who said they wanted to party, got a motel room, stripped and jumped in the shower expecting the women to join him. His luck ended there (mlive.com)	(93)
(KCRG)	Semi overturns and spills 45,000 pounds of batteries. Driver not charged (kcrg.com)	(74)
(Some Guy)	Photoshop this flower carrier (s16.radikal.ru)	(31)
(The Press of Atlantic City)	A good yarn? Town tries to solve the mystery of the midnight knitter (pressofatlanticcity.com)	(94)
	Large Hadron Collider misses again. This is not a repeat from 2011 (news.bbc.co.uk)	(376)
(WALB 10 News)	Ric Romero headline of the day: "Poor choices can end with bad results" (walb.com)	(46)
	A blind man with a seeing-eye dog who was denied entry at a Subway restaurant files outlandish lawsuits with claims that the experience has caused him unimaginable stress. Just kidding, he just won't eat there anymore (cbc.ca)	(179)
	Not news: Gunman prompts school lockdown. Fark: Gunman was wielding a Nerf gun (omaha.com)	(106)
	Now that Al Gore has a Nobel Peace Prize, his creation might be next (news.bbc.co.uk)	(88)
(Some Guy)	Tips for helping your dog to age gracefully. Apparently getting him a toupee and a Corvette doesn't cut it (mnn.com)	(46)
	Next stop on the Failboni thin ice pond tour - Keystone, CO (with sinking zamboni pic) (denverpost.com)	(57)
(Eating Our Words)	10 impressive-looking dishes that are deceptively easy to make. Your dog wants some coq au vin (blogs.houstonpress.com)	(204)
	Driver charged with DUI hit nearly triple the legal threshold for drunkenness. Fortunately, she didn't hit anything else with her school bus full of kids (dailyherald.com)	(57)
	Vitamin D may help reduce the risk of almost any disease, say doctors who are trying to milk this information campaign for all it's worth (chicagotribune.com)	(92)
	More miracles from modern medicine: "They said there was a rare, but real chance that my bottom jaw would become infected and might have to be removed" (abcnews.go.com)	(65)
	The US Supreme Court cannot afford to be seen taking the side of one corporation over another corporation (cbsnews.com)	(313)
	Defectors spill details of Kim Il-sung and Kim Jong-il's secret network of agents, whose mission was purchasing Western goods from classified shopping lists (news.yahoo.com)	(66)
	Fresh off an armed raid of three bars for violating a silly administrative policy on beer, State Police raid a city beer distributor and seize cases of expensive Belgian and German brews (philly.com)	(115)
	Is the number of earthquakes on the rise? Are we employing sheep's bladders properly to defend ourselves? (washingtonpost.com)	(66)
	Research shows, Problem Children twice as likely to suffer chronic pain as adults. Karma tag sleeping peacefully (news.bbc.co.uk)	(63)
(Jezebel)	First day on the job, the new editor of Jezebel talked about her constipation. Of course, that attracted a dude with a fetish. So she interviewed him (jezebel.com)	(92)
	Photoshop this focused flow (s.wsj.net)	(37)
	Next time your school's booster club is having a sale of donated items, be sure to go through the stuff and remove the porn, pirated DVDs and Aryan Nation publications (upi.com)	(77)
(Some Guy)	Miami residents can now go online to report municipal problems like trash littering the street. Service to be online in time for Jersey Shore cast to arrive (govtech.com)	(18)
	If you think fish can't live to be 43 years old, you don't know Buttkiss (cbsnews.com)	(64)
	Town puts of street signs warning drivers of drunk pedestrians. With a picture that any Farker would be proud of (telegraph.co.uk)	(63)
	Car designers in 1958 thought we'd drive two-wheeled cars that were guided by radar and balanced by gyroscopes in the year 2000. Instead, we're driving Camry's with problematic pedals (life.com)	(123)
	NYPD informs public that rooftop sculptures are not jumpers, and that gargoyles are harmless as long as you DO NOT BLINK (nj.com)	(158)
	Records show Ohio State shooter had complained his bosses were treating him unfairly, had taken his red stapler (aolnews.com)	(68)
(action figures)	Mad Men Barbie dolls - now we can have sexist office politics in the comfort of our own basements - in easily washable plastic, no less (popeater.com)	(85)
	Jon Stewart to Bush crony Marc Theissen. "It's a very selective world in which you live and it must be quite lovely but here in the real world things aren't so cut and dried" (thedailyshow.com)	(762)
	Prosecutor says that ex-sportscaster was so anxious to help a 14-year old girl in distress that he asked her pimp if he could get with her again (nydailynews.com)	(78)
	"... and make sure the soldiers bring a tank, I wanna ride in a tank" (wtopnews.com)	(99)
	Cool: Teacher gives classroom full of students a lesson in structural integrity. Not so cool: she was driving her jeep at the time (freep.com)	(28)
	Another benefit of Cuba's socialized healthcare: Free sex change operations (abcnews.go.com)	(78)
(Cape Cod Times)	74-year old woman accidentally goes through car wash on the outside of her car (capecodonline.com)	(50)
	You'll be happy to know that TSA screener feeling up your daughter isn't really into her -- he already has a 14 year old girlfriend named "Kitten" (bostonherald.com)	(98)
(Providence Journal)	300-pound bronze female sculpture disappears in Rhode Island, possibly headed to the Jersey shore (projo.com)	(49)
	Is it still considered stealing if you pay for it? (boston.com)	(65)
	Not news: Facing a year in jail for criminal possession of a weapon after hitting a cop. Fark: With a snowball (nydailynews.com)	(110)
	Study finds obesity and depression to be a vicious circle. Circular, like a doughnut right? (news.yahoo.com)	(70)
(Some Old Fart)	Your mom may not be the slut we thought she was but your dad is still a horny old bastard (ottawacitizen.com)	(74)
	New theme park opening for people with special needs. Cartman already preparing with a rock montage (abcnews.go.com)	(47)
(LehighValleyLive)	Just a tip: If you need to drive over to the police station for business, sober up first (lehighvalleylive.com)	(11)
	Think about your six closest friends. Now try to guess which one has herpes (reuters.com)	(201)
	By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you Man and ... pillow (metro.co.uk)	(142)
	Corey Haim officially out of the running for Lost Boys sequel (tmz.com)	(731)
	If you're a police officer who enjoys rubbing your penis on cars, you might want to skip mentioning that in your blog (thelocal.se)	(55)
(The Register Citizen)	Psycho killer...signs himself...out of the ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-hospital, then he...runs runs runs runs, runs runs runs away (registercitizen.com)	(91)
(Psychology Today)	It's official: Good-looking women like Lara Logan, Melissa Theuriau, and Debra LaFave still have edge in virtually everything over plain-looking women (psychologytoday.com)	(154)
	Nicholas Sarkozy and Carla Bruni are both having affairs. France surrenders (telegraph.co.uk)	(96)
	Iron Photoshop: Hotwheels (hotwheels.com)	(19)
	Ten coolest college courses, or; Why college is a joke nowadays (huffingtonpost.com)	(239)
	The nicest nurse in the world fired for having sex with grieving men who just lost their wives to cancer (thesun.co.uk)	(156)
	Today's female teacher arrested for having sex with student brought to you by sunny Burbank, California (w/you know you'd hit that pic) (nbclosangeles.com)	(110)
	Chuck Norris would be 70 today if time wasn't afraid of him (en.wikipedia.org)	(341)
	And the next extreme sport is: Coupon clipping. Wait, what? (online.wsj.com)	(66)